I Am A Fighter Baby, I Will Not Stop

So if you've been keeping up with my tweets, you've noticed that I have developed quite an obsession with boxing. Muay Thai, to be exact. It started back in October. I was at my therapist's office, in tears, wondering why I was so damn depressed. I have everything I want in life! Why am I feeling this way? What's wrong with me? I'm miserable. Do I need drugs? This isn't normal!

"When's the last time you went to the gym?" he asked.

I bowed my head in shame and flicked the sleeve of my Starbucks cup. "I don't have time. I'm SO busy. I just can't fit it in my schedule anymore!"

Truth was, I had become much too accustomed to coming home and drowning in a couple glasses of red wine each night rather than burning off the anxiety at a Spin class.

"You need to leave my office right now and go put on your gym clothes and workout," he said.

"But I'm exhausted..."

"Doctor's orders. GO."

I left his office, wiping the mascara off my cheeks that had drizzled down my face during my pity party. I took out my phone and paused to remember the number to my gym. There had been a time where I had it programmed in my contacts, and could recite it backward and forward by heart.

I googled the number and contemplated calling. Could I really do this? I wondered. I knew the only way back into the gym was with a great trainer and a new workout plan. I had to go hard or go home. The treadmill was not gonna cut it this time. I had collectively logged dozens of hours on the elliptical machine over the past few years and I knew my body had gotten used to it. I needed someone to push me, and something to inspire me again. I needed to feel challenged.

I made an appointment that night with a personal trainer who specialized in Muay Thai. I had no idea what Muay Thai was when I signed up (it sounded more like a Chinese dish to me), but I knew it involved kicking and punching things. And in the state I was in, that was music to my ears.

The next night, I had my first Muay Thai session and never looked back. I've been training for 4 months now, and I'm getting stronger each time. I'm more toned, more empowered and most importantly - happier than ever before. There's something about watching your body -- and mind --  transform that is so amazing. The fact that during my first lesson, I could barely raise my leg high enough to do anything that resembled a roundhouse kick, to now doing combos and flying around my gym like a character from Street Fighter is mind blowing.

But it was at my last session when I realized just WHY I love boxing so much. I was on my way to the gym, and Christina Aguilera shuffled onto my iPod. "Fighter" came on, and I started listening to the words. I remember listening to that song a few years ago when I really felt like I was hanging on by a thread and fighting with every piece of me just to get through the day.

Makes me that much stronger
Makes me work a little bit harder
It makes me that much wiser
So thanks for making me a fighter
Made me learn a little bit faster
Made my skin a little bit thicker
Makes me that much smarter
So thanks for making me a fighter

Boxing a fighting sport. It's about endurance, and picking yourself back up again after you fall on the floor. It's about perfecting your skill and technique so that each time you're in the ring, you can fight better and smarter. It represents everything I believe in about life. I've fallen down and gotten back up more times than I can count. But the point is, I got back up. 

And I always will.

And that is something worth toasting to.